Dot.Com Refugee #1: Laid Off

March 13, 2001


While Rose and I are taking a much-needed break from employment, I thought I’d write and give you all an update on our happenings.

Oh, what a difference a year makes! In January of 2000, the millennium seemed to be filled with hope and happiness. Our family income was into the six figures and we couldn’t figure out enough ways to spend our money. “Excuse me, sir, but is there a more expensive option I could choose?”

Cut to January of 2001, our family income dips below six dollars. Nada. Zero. Zilch. We’re making bubkis. That’s Yiddish for Nada, Zero, Zilch. This millenium sucks!

LAID OFF: Now we are living somewhat comfortably on the dole; the State of Colorado is paying our bills, but it’s a little hard to understand as well. I’ve worked everyday for the past 12 years and my unemployment benefits were cut in half. Rose quit her job over a year ago to stay home to watch the kids; she’s getting twice as much money as me. Fortunately, she, as always, puts all of her earnings into the family pot.

I found out on Dec. 21 that would no longer be paying me after Dec. 28. I appreciated the fact that they didn’t deliver the news as sooner because I might have cancelled our family trip to Minnesota. Fortunately, they were thoughtful enough to wait until just four days before the actual holiday, so everything worked out for the best. For the sake of brevity, I won’t go into the details, but suffice it to say, I’m no longer available at the spiz phone and e-mail.

Okay, enough of the sob story, I won’t even get into the time about a week ago that a local judge put out a warrant for my arrest or the night I thought I had ruptured my spleen.

JOB SEARCH: I’m looking for a job. I didn’t want to write this e-mail until I found new job, but when you see as many “, dot.gone” articles in the paper and online as I have, you make adjustments. I’ve had pretty good luck so far interviewing with Cone, Inc., the 1999 Mid-Size PR Agency of the Year, about handling the Olympic account and Rotary International, about handling their worldwide publicity, among others.

I have a recruiter. My resume is uploaded on a dozen job sites. Now is the time for networking. Know of any good jobs? Let me know.

BRONZE MEDAL MEDIA: Another option is to start my own communications company. I’ve picked out a name and have a logo and everything. BRONZE MEDAL MEDIA. I do need help picking out a tagline, which one do you like?

  • “Lowballing our way to the top”
  • “Hey, a medal’s a medal”
  • “When you can’t afford the very best”
  • “Why keep swinging for the fences; sometimes all you need is a single”
  • “A Rocky Mountain institution since February”
  • “Absolutely no chicken by-products”
  • “Be realistic, not everyone can go for the gold”
  • “You can keep reaching for the stars, but let’s face facts, even the closest star is still a billion miles away.”


  • Strategury Communications … Conservative. Compassionate. Communications. (in honor of George W.)
  • SnydeRemarks Media … surly, sarcastic, solutions.
  • Lloyd Dobler Communications … we don’t sell anything, buy anything or process anything. (based on Lloyd Dobler’s quote from the movie, Say Anything, when his date’s father asked about his future aspirations. He said, “I don’t want to sell anything, buy anything or process anything as a career. I don’t want to sell anything bought or processed… or buy anything sold or processed… or process anything sold, bought or processed… or repair anything sold, bought or processed. You know, as a career, I don’t want to do that.”)
  • Fred Garvin Communications … let us be your communications whore. (based on Dan Ackroyd’s SNL character, Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute)
  • Got Three Kids to Feed Communications … we’re hungry, literally.

WHO’S YOUR DADDY: A film by Audrius Barzdukas called, “Charlie: A Bowler” debuted to rave reviews at the recent Pike’s Peak Passion Film Festival. It’s a two-and-a-half minute tour de force of nothing but images of me bowling and talking about bowling.

Take care,

Dot.Com Refugee #2: Tater-Tot Hotdish


This entry was posted in Dot.Com Refugee. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *